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Opinion Queer in Translation Truth or lie?
Opinion Queer in Translation Truth or lie?
| Truth or lie? |
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| Monday, 18 August 2008 20:47 |
 The night I came out I cooked a candlelit baked dinner, I had an
engagement ring in my back pocket and my girlfriend was sitting in
front of me, waiting eagerly on what I was about to say.
 The night I came out I cooked a candlelit baked dinner, I had an engagement ring in my back pocket and my girlfriend was sitting in front of me, waiting eagerly on what I was about to say.Rather than a proposal, I told her I thought I was gay. In the following month I came out to my church friends and was told I couldn’t be gay and Christian because I was possessed by a gay demon. My mother’s reaction was whatever makes me happy. Overall, my coming out with its little speed bumps along the way was a pretty easy experience. For some people, coming out to their friends and family might be one of the hardest things they may ever have to face. Taking that step can sometimes change everything that person has ever known. It is scary, daunting, but at the same time uplifting and freeing. Let me tell you about Boom Boy. We’ve been dating for just over two months. He is out to a few of his close friends, but as our relationship has grown, the longing to share who he really is with the people closest to him has grown stronger. You see, he comes from a family that is very close-knit and that’s the hardest thing for him, to feel that he has to lie about who he is. The fear that he faces is that his family may be hurt; it’s a fear shared by many. But it’s not always the hurt of disappointment, sometimes it’s the hurt of worry. I put myself in the parent’s shoes: I thought about how we live in a straight orientated society and how my son will be classed as another number in the minority; of how he might be faced with persecution and discrimination, the constant fear of the spread of AIDS. To think from the parental presepective about what their flesh and blood might have to experience provides an eye opener. That is why I think when coming out to the people most dearly to you it is important to show that you are aware of the sometimes scary reality that we might have to face, but also to show that you are ok, that it isn’t always a bad thing and that there are also many beautiful things that come with being gay, the freedom to be truly happy being yourself. It is a shame that today so many people still put their own comfort zone over others’ well-being or what they consider right for them. It’s a sad reality that we still have to face this in the society we live in. But the thought I want to challenge you with is life can be short and unexpected. Do we want to live out a Brokeback Mountain where the people we care about never get to experience who we really are? This weekend, Boom Boy is thinking about taking that first step, to reveal to his family who he really is. As his partner, I can be here to support him through what follows. He is about to do what many of us have done, what many are going through and what many hope to do. Ultimately why? Because he has discovered that it is better to live a truth then a lie. - QIT |