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 Coming out to family and friends is hard enough, but these young GLBT people are telling the world via YouTube. Reg Domingo reports.
Fifteen-year-old Jesse Matheson remembers the moment with crystal clarity.
“I came out to my parents by writing my nan a letter,” he says. “She was as confused as I was but in the end she was able to sit down and talk to me about it. So it was good really.” Not long after, his nan broke the news to his mum who, a few months later, marched with her son in the Mardi Gras Parade.
Jesse’s story is hardly rare; after all, we all have tales of coming out. But what makes it exceptional is the forum in which he shares it: YouTube. “It was great to have my face connected to a video that thousands of people would see,” Jesse tells Queensland Pride. “Coming out is a different experience for all.”
Jesse is part of a growing number of young GLBT people who openly speak about their sexuality on video-sharing websites like MySpace and YouTube. Many use it as a means of documenting their experiences, while others, like Jesse, use it as a way of reaching out to others.
Since joining YouTube in April of this year, Jesse’s video series, Ask a emo/gay/australian guy (www.youtube.com/jessematheson) has clocked up more than 36,908 views and currently has more than 1,144 subscribers. His coming out video alone has been seen more than 7,692 times. “YouTube has been a big part of my life,” Jesse says. “I’m able to view thousands of people’s views and see how thousands of people deal with issues. I learn from people and they learn from me.”
Recent studies by the Australian Research Centre for Sex, Health and Society at La Trobe University have found that 86 per cent of young people now use the internet for sexuality-related purposes, while more than two-thirds had came out to someone online. The study also found the same-sex-attracted youth were coming out younger, a trend that goes hand-in-hand with the rising popularity of social networking sites like MySpace and YouTube.
“Young people feel safer when they come out online,” says Lynne Hillier, the study’s lead author, adding that the element of distance provided by the internet is a major factor. “Young people are doing it themselves and the communication just gets more complicated and more in your face all the time. They’re being young and strong.” From a young person’s point of view, “it would be incredibly empowering to see yourself on the web coming out,” Lynne adds.
Feeling a sense of empowerment is what motivated 19-year-old Chelsea Crowson (pictured) to post a video detailing her coming out story.
Chelsea, from Houston in the US, posted her video (www.youtube.com/chelsme) in response to an internet project organised by US organisation Human Rights Campaign. As part of National Coming Out Day (October 11), the group asked people to post video messages sharing their coming out experiences.
“I made the video for myself really,” Chelsea tells Queensland Pride. “It was somewhat of a symbol that I had come to terms with my sexuality and was ready to accept it.”
Chelsea says that the responses to her video have, for the most part, been positive. “The one response I’ve had the most trouble dealing with is when my mother told me that she found out via MySpace. I’m very close to my mother but I was not prepared for that.”
While posting videos may help a young person in terms of confidence and self-esteem, La Trobe’s Lynne warns that young people should be mindful of the video’s potential reach.
“It ceases to be anonymous once you put your video on the web and you can’t take it back on YouTube,” she says. “A young person, if they decide to do this, needs to be sure that what they are in fact potentially doing is coming out to the person next door, their mates at school, their family, the lot.”
But Crowson takes comfort in the fact that, in the overall scheme of things, her video has been able to touch others. “The amount of people who have told me that my coming out video inspired them is astounding,” she says. “And these are people that I never would have had any contact with had they not seen my video. It is amazing to have that support from a simple video that I spent about 15 minutes making.”
Finding this kind of support is what spurred 19-year-old Justin* to post videos that document his transgender journey from male to female (MTF) (www.youtube.com/etherealkingdom).
“My main motivation was to get in contact with other people who were going through the same experiences I was and who were my age,” he says. “Then I slowly became aware that I was helping and, in some cases, inspiring people. So I was then motivated to make videos that I myself would find helpful if I was looking for support or inspiration.”
Justin, who is from Melbourne, says that while his parents accepted his decisions, they have not taken any steps to assist him during his transition. And though his friends were supportive, it was only through YouTube that he was able to connect with others that have had the same experiences.
“For young transsexuals, there is always the fear that they will not be passable and to see older, attractive transsexuals who are clearly passable talking about their lives on the internet is a very inspiring thing,” he says. “They also have the opportunity to talk to them and get help from them, which is an amazing thing for young transsexuals who constantly feel alone and feel like nobody understands them.
“You can make some great friends through YouTube,” Justin continues. “And there are people who are always ready to help and give you advice.”
* surname withheld
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